Help me out here, people

I usually eat lunch at a hospital cafeteria right near my office, partly because it's a low-key place to read and eat and get away from work, and partly because I have a few choices for a lunch with a protein and two sides for six bucks.  This way I don't have to bring lunch in from home and eat at my desk or in the break room, and I don't have to go to one of the same few boring lunch places over and over again.  Also, this is when I try to eat my vegetables.



One thing that puzzles me, and I'm not getting any help from Google.  One cafeteria staple is the 'chicken quarter' -- a leg and thigh that have not been separated, and are served to you in one giant piece.  How exactly am I supposed to go about eating one of these big mothers?  I don't want to be all Henry VIII and pick it up and knaw on it, especially of it's some sort of messy tandoori-style preparation.  On the other hand, when I attempt to cut it up with a fork and knife, I can barely get enough off to feed a small child. 

Any ideas?  Is there a secret and civilized solution to this problem?  Or is it (as I suspect) just an easy and lazy way for the head chef to crank out a lot of substantial-looking entrees with extremely minimal effort?

Easy Poutine

Not a photo of what I made.

I finally made some full-on Poutine for a snack last Sunday.  Here's what I used:

• Frozen french fries, baked in the oven (obviously, fresh are better, but this was a quick and easy snack)
• Bisto gravy granules (really does make tasty gravy, and you can keep it forever in your cupboard)
• Beecher's fresh cheese curds (made locally--the most gourmet part of the snack)

1. Preheat oven, put your fries in.
2. Start boiling water for your Bisto.
3. Chip curds into slightly smaller bits.
4. Sprinkle curds over finished fries on a nice big platter.
5. Mix your gravy and then pour all over fries.
6. Open a beer and enjoy poutine while watching TV.  Offer some to the person who went to the store and bought the curds and fries for you.

Family-Friendly

Here's a fun and stupid thing I found on the internets:

Watch Edited Movies With These
Edited Movies DVD Players

"Now we can finally watch Last Tango in Paris together."

Control the content of movies in your own home. Filter both profanity and offensive scenes while you watch. Without modifying the DVD. Works with over 4000 regular versions of movies that you already own or rent from any video store.

• Filter your movies from Graphic Violence, Suggestive Scenes, Strong or Vulgar Language.
• Filter popular TV Series like 24 and Lost.
• Control the rating of the movies allowed to be played.
• Password protected settings.
• No waiting for edited movies in the mail or letting someone else decide what you want edited... It's your choice!

What a fascinating and lame idea!  I'm sure you could have a wonderfully incoherent movies experience this way, if you pick the right film. 

However, what I'd really like is a DVD player that adds sex, violence, and profanity to boring family movies to jazz them up! Or at least a DVD with all the bits they edited out of those 4000 movies...